Luggage heaven

Do you like helping people with their baggage? I’m no porter, but I love it.

If you can help someone who is taking a heavy case onto or off a train, it makes it so much easier for them. At a stroke, something that was a bit difficult becomes something nice and manageable.

I was thinking about this on a recent journey back from the Alps, and did it a few times on the TGV and the Eurostar (see pic, above). Plus, I now can answer more confidently if gym fanatics ask: "Do you even lift, bro?"

The baggage thing reminds me of a fable that my big sister recounted at a family dinner, about Heaven and Hell.

In both Heaven and Hell, people were seated around a long table laden with the most sumptuous feast you could imagine. Mouthwatering dishes of every variety, from every corner of the earth, were laid out on beautiful plates on white tablecloths.

The only problem was that, in both Heaven and Hell, each item of cutlery was a metre in length. These long knives, forks and spoons made it impossible to feed oneself.  In Hell, this was torture. The ravenous assembled guests struggled desperately to manoeuvre the food into their mouths, but were failing desperately and beginning to starve.

In Heaven, it was a different scenario: each guest used the long cuttlery to feed another guest across the table. Problem solved. 

Hence why I say: helping people with bags makes travelling by train a bit more heavenly. As you get off, just look back and see if anyone is coming off with a big bag, and lend a hand.

Of course, if you want to be mischievous and annoy friends once you've helped them (with this or any other small bit of help), then just after they thank you, say:

"My pleasure—" before winking and adding with faux modesty "—not all heroes wear capes..."